Get to work, bitch. (probably NSFW.)

Archive for March 2010

This is it.

March 31, 2010

by margo fontaine This right here.  This is the body I want.  I know I can’t see most of it, but come on, people.  Look at it. I’m not 5’11” and I never will be, so there’s not chance I’ll ever have the ACTUAL body I want.  I’m learning to accept it.  But this.  I […]

Wednesday weigh-in

March 31, 2010

by kiki dogwood 162.6.  Down a pound from last week.  And I’ll tell you what I did, bitches.  I ate more and I sat on my ass. However, I did take my bread consumption down to almost nil and started having turkey slices when I wake up in the morning.  THIS IS THE WEEK.  I […]

Oink, indeed.

March 30, 2010

by margo fontaine I needed a little more. This day can fucking suck it.  But it ended pretty great.  And I’m really glad to have a Kiki on my team.  That’s the best.


March 29, 2010

by kiki dogwood Hang in there, Margs.  Fuck the fucking scale, fuck the sobriety train, and especially fuck Buddy McJerk and I don’t mean in the good way.

Choosing sucks.

March 28, 2010

by margo fontaine But I’m choosing this over cocktails.  It had frigging better choose me back.

Friday fat check

March 26, 2010

by margo fontaine 135.4 lbs.  I don’t want to talk about it. Okay, fine, I’ll talk about it.  There is no way I consumed 7500 extra calories last week, so I’m pretty sure I did not actually gain 2.4 lbs of fat. Which can only mean one thing.  I’m back on the Booze-Free Express.  Are […]

Guestblogger: Samuel L. Jackson

March 25, 2010

Ladies, listen up. I woke up this morning and my mojodar was going cuh-razy.  I don’t like it. And I can’t have it. I mean, dig it: as the official Earth Chapter Delegate for Universal BadAssMotherFuckertude, it’s my job to keep the moxie balance on this planet.  I mean, it’s my JOB, okay?  You don’t […]

Modern booty

March 25, 2010

by kiki dogwood Nearly every photo of her in google images is bare-assed.  You can’t tell from the lighting in this one, but that trunk is stuffed full of junk. It’s encouraging, though, because her ass looks like my ass (on a good day, which there hasn’t been one in over a year).

Starting over. Again.

March 24, 2010

by margo fontaine 1.) I’m so glad you’re back because we have got some serious work to do if we’re going to steal our own bikini challenge away from YouKnowWho of the 5-week-post-preggers perfect booty shots.  WE OWN THIS BITCH. 2.) I fell off the wagon sort of, and I am feeling fat and icky.  […]

Wednesday weigh-in

March 24, 2010

by kiki dogwood I’m breaking up with Jenny today.  I’m back to weighing myself on my own scale, which isn’t as accurate or sensitive, so we’re starting new with a weight of 163.6.  That’s 2/10 of a pound less than last week on Jenny’s scale.  Wonder why I’m breaking up with you, Jenny?  Don’t wonder.  […]