Get to work, bitch. (probably NSFW.)

Margo needs to eat this

by kiki dogwood

Let’s help Margo be a grown up and eat some vegetables.  Since she won’t cook, we need a list of raw vegetables that are not gross.  Go.

I say bell peppers.  Red, yellow and orange, but not green.  Dipped in full-fat sour cream.

Also, spinach salads.

What else?


18 Responses to “Margo needs to eat this”

  1. My favorite is a bag of baby carrots with hummus. Easy to transport and so tasty. And cucumbers with a dash of salt, I put those in a small Tupperware and eat at my desk. Mmm.

  2. Excellent, Anon. Are you paying attention, Margs? Anon is a grown up and eats her veggies.

    And we can’t suggest tomatoes. Not because they’re not a vegetable, which they’re not, but because Margs is known to throw up on herself at the thought of eating something with the texture of a tomato.

    But woman, you are missing out if you don’t eat caprese salad.

  3. I am a HUGE fan of raw spinach (as a salad) with pistachios and a raspberry dressing. I pretty much eat that every day for lunch.

    My favorites are:
    roasted asparagus (lightly coated in olive oil)
    steamed broccoli
    vegan leek & potatoe soup (yum!)

    and I always have these on hand – they are soooo easy and they are quite tasty!
    Green Giant Boxed Simply Steam Broccoli and Carrots
    Green Giant Boxed Simply Steam Garden Vegetable Medley
    Green Giant Boxed Simply Steam No Sauce Baby Sweet Peas
    Green Giant Boxed Simply Steam No Sauce Shoepeg White Corn
    Green Giant Boxed Simply Steam No Sauce Sugar Snap Peas

  4. You guys are swell!

    Don’t get mad, but I also hate:
    peppers (all kinds)
    cucumbers (sorry: SO GROSS.)
    brussel sprouts
    alfalfa sprouts
    raw broccoli and cauliflower (I like cooked broccoli, but still not crazy about the cauliflower)
    onions, leeks, shallots, chives
    collard greens, beet greens, turnip greens, and I’m pretty sure I don’t like kale
    broccoli rabe
    any winter squash (I like pumpkin in cookies and bread and pie)
    okra (unless it’s fried and then i find it delicious)
    avocado (I know. But gross.)
    and my sworn enemy: TOMATO.

    Which leaves raw veggies I would eat to be pretty much carrots. (I’ll keep looking for a humus I don’t hate, but I’m not holding my breath.) I’ll eat celery if forced, but what’s the point of celery? It’s just a stalk of water to use as a vessel for peanut butter or cream cheese.

    Cooked veggies I’ll eat (but the cooking part is the whole problem) are carrots, corn, peas (all the candy vegetables), broccoli, green beans, zucchini, yellow squash, asparagus (delicious)… uh… there has to be more than that. How pathetic.

    Also mushrooms (i know they’re not vegetables) and potatoes—I’m even getting fonder of sweet potatoes, which I used to hate—but I’ll tell you right now, I’m not going to be cooking potatoes, plus they’re all starch.

    I like spinach salad, I guess, but the last 4 weeks I have bought it and had to through most of it out because I’m just not eating it. And I like fruit okay (not YOU, Tomato), but I’ve also been throwing a lot of that out. It’s stupid.

    I suppose I’ll try the frozen microwavable route… but I do have quite a bit of that on hand, and I just never remember (or want) to eat it.

    I guess I need some kind of set up that forces me to eat vegetables. Do I need to make a deal with y’all? Sign a contract? Is someone going to ground me?

  5. I can change your mind about brussel sprouts.

    They have to be teeny tiny, or cut small, and sauteed in a little butter to the point of being crispy with fresh garlic and a sprinkle of sea salt. LOVE THEM.

    And who hates hummus? Seriously. I don’t even have to tell you what brand to buy because you can buy garlic hummus of any brand and it’s awesome.

  6. But it still tastes like hummus.

    OKAY. I will get some tomorrow and try to like it.

    And I am eating baby carrots right now.

  7. I am having a glass of red wine right now because Kat said I could.

    You know you can always blanch a bunch of green beans, salt them and keep them for a snack for a few days.

  8. C O O K I N G .

  9. Yes yes yes. Cooking for 1 sucks. It does. Remedy that.

  10. >.<

  11. I’ve looked through a list of emoticons but came up empty handed. Something in my heart is nagging at me, saying it means, “Margo is telling you to kiss her ass.”

    Or is it about Margo’s kitties? Like, “Margo isn’t really cooking for 1 because she has kitties. So let’s give Margo some kitty food recipes.”

  12. You know what needs to be said here? Margo will not eat onion but she will eat a chicken tender that she cooked a week ago and tucked away to sleep in her fridge for an entire week.


  13. OK, we’re fighting now.

    My ass may be single, but it weighs 131.4 pounds. AND I worked out today. So, yes, you can kiss it. And then have some more fried chicken.

  14. 131.4, eh? So that’s the weight we’re going with for next week? Because next week I’m bringing it.

  15. Bringing it where? McDonalds?

  16. I ❤ you guys. And cooking for one sucks.

  17. Hey guess what? You’ve pissed me off enough with this McDonald’s talk that I’m going to the gym today. So thanks.

  18. You’re welcome.

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